Spiked
by atem15
Summary: Someone spikes the coffee pot in the BAU. Can Hotch figure out who made all his Agents go crazy? Warning! Slash between Morgan and Reid.
1. Chapter 1

Criminal Minds- Spiked pt 1.

Hotch walked into the BAU expecting to find everyone working diligently, and to have a nice quiet day of paper work. It seemed fate had a different plan for this day. When he stepped out of the elevator, there was chaos.

The first thing he noticed was that Kevin Lynch was dressed like a sumo wrestler, and was wrestling a ninja. Upon further study, he saw that the ninja was Anderson.

Before he could yell at them too stop and go back to work, he heard a loud shout of "Bam" coming from Rossi's office. All of a sudden, the door busted open and Rossi was holding a tray. "I have made the most delicious cupcakes. And now I will add a little kick to them." He says, picking up some sprinkles. Without warning he shouts again. "Bam!" And then he goes into his office again.

"What is going on here?" Hotch asks, completely confused.

He walks up the stairs to the round table room, to find Morgan and Reid sitting at the table, making out as if their lives depended on it, JJ playing video games in the corner and screaming at the Game boy. Behind her, he saw Garcia coloring JJ's hair pink with a pink highlighter.

"What is going on here? You two stop it immediately, don't you know what Strauss will do if she sees you like this?" Hotch shouts to Morgan and Reid.

"Take it easy man! President Strauss legalized Gay relationships, and gay marriage in this building." Says a very naked Emily Prentiss, before she runs away screaming freedom.

Before Hotch could recover from what he just witnessed, he heard presidential music come on and Strauss walk over to the banister. "Shh! President Strauss is going to make another announcement." JJ says.

"Attention BAU members, I farted!" She shouts, and everyone cheers. Hotch was left horrified as Strauss walked back into her office and closed the door.

Hotch decided that he had seen enough and walked back to his office. Something had obviously happened. He had to figure out what had caused his very serious team to go bananas. Just then he thought of something. Everyone drinks out of the same coffee pot. So he called the lab to take a sample of the coffee pot and tried to work with all the distractions.

As he was working, the first distraction came in the form of Kevin and Anderson as they appeared in front of his door. "You are no match for my skills you tub of lard." Anderson says to Kevin with a fake Japanese accent.

"Bring it on you Naruto reject!" Kevin shouts back, fake Japanese accent just as bad. And then they rolled away in a cloud of smoke.

The next distraction came in the form of Emily running past his door, still naked, and Rossi chasing after her. "But Emily, you have to try my apple turnovers. BAM!"

The next one was Morgan chasing after a very distraught looking Reid who was walking away from him. "Baby, please, I didn't mean to look at Emily! I love you so much baby. You gotta know that!"

Reid turns towards him and starts sobbing. "Do you?"

"Yes baby, let me show you." And with that, Morgan's lips were on Reid's again and they were making out as they backed away back to the round table room.

The next one was Garcia Chasing after Morgan and Reid, trying to color Reid's hair with a purple highlighter, and the final one was Strauss making another announcement. "Everyone! I have a very special announcement! My feet hurt!" She says, walking back into her office again.

Just then, Hotch gets a call. "What?" He asks, annoyed.

"Agent Hotchner, we got the test results back from the lab. There seems to be an unknown substance in the coffee, but we can prove that it isn't serious, and it should wear off tonight." The lab tech says.

"Thank you." Hotch says, relieved. He then gets up, and tells everyone to go home and get some rest. They were all out of there in 5 seconds.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~BAU~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The next day, everyone looked hung over. "What happened yesterday?" JJ asked, holding her head. Talking hurt.

"All I know is that I woke up naked next to Morgan, with purple hair." Reid says, sunglasses on to block out the light coming from the window.

"Yeah, Kevin was wearing one of those Sumo wrestler fat suits and I had highlighter all over my hands." Garcia says.

"Why was I dressed like a Ninja? And why do I hurt all over? Anderson asks.

"Strange, Kevin hurt too." Garcia says.

"I don't even remember what happened." Emily says, laying her head down on her desk.

"Me neither." adds Morgan.

Hotch was in his office, smiling, they may all feel sick now, but he was happy to have his team back to normal. He didn't know who spiked their coffee, but he decided it wasn't a threat, and continued to go on with his day. But he did have some nice blackmail on Strauss now. In the form of a video tape.

TBC… I'm gonna add another few chapters to this because me and my crazy cousin just came up with more. Tell me how you like chapter 1. I know, they're all OC, but it fit this time. XD


	2. Chapter 2

Criminal Minds- Drugged team pt. 2

"Ugh! Why isn't my brain working today?" Reid asks, trying to think of what he wanted to write in his report.

"You might have left it under your bed." Garcia says, laughing.

"I find that highly illogical. How can your brain pop out of your head and you still be alive?" Reid asks confused.

"Idk, but people live without them every day." Garcia argues.

"It's still highly unlikely." Reid says back, starting to get annoyed. He obviously wasn't getting his report done tonight.

"Haven't you ever seen a show called Jersey shore?" she asks as if he should know.

"No, I don't watch TV very often." Reid says.

"Well the actors on there live day to day with nothing but hot air in their heads." She says, laughing at the thought.

"I see people like that all the time on this job." Reid says matter of factly.

"Yeah see? So it is possible." She says, smugly and immaturely sticking her tongue out at him.

"But they have brains, they just don't have knowledge." Reid says, a smug, smart aleck like smile on his face.

"Meh! Same diff." Garcia says indifferently.

"Ha! I win!" Reid's smug smile getting bigger.

"Nu uh! I win, you lose!" She says, sticking her tongue out again. Meanwhile Morgan's sitting at his desk, smiling at his childish 'friend' and baby girl act immature.

"No! I do." Reid says, getting fed up.

"I do!" she says as they get in each others faces. Morgan could swear he could see the sparks between their eyes.

"Well you know what? I'm awesome, so your point is moot!" She says smugly.

"I always get my way. All I have to do is pout and use the eyes." Reid says.

"Well I'm cute too. Plus, I can do the best little girl voice! And I can make myself cry! Therefore, I WIN!" Garcia shouts.

"Guys you are both cute! Can you stop please?" Morgan begs, having heard enough.

"He started it!" She says pointing at Reid.

"No! She did!" They stood their pointing at each other, tears in their eyes.

"Ok! Ok! No crying. I don't want my ever loving soul to be shattered." He says, pulling both of them into a hug and kissing them on the forehead. "I love you both, and you are both cute."

"Well duh, you have to say that. You love him. We have to ask someone who's not in love with us." She says, getting her imp face.

"Who? Hotch and Rossi?" Morgan asks, avoiding the fact that Garcia said he loves Reid. The truth was, he did love Reid, but he wasn't sure Reid felt the same.

"YES! Let's go ask them Reid." She says excitedly, pulling Reid with her.

"W-Wha?" He asks, following her, Garcia's love comment obviously going over his head.

"Come on, it'll be fun. We can see if Hotch or Rossi have feelings." She says, climbing the stairs to the platform where their boss's offices are.

"I'll be scarred." Reid states.

"Oh you'll be fine! Besides, this'll help me with my Rossi's a zombie or robot theory." She says.

"Oh geeze." Reid says as they open the door to find Rossi and Hotch drinking a half glass of scotch.

"Rossi, Hotch! Reid wants to ask you something!" She says, pointing to the shocked genius.

"W-What? N-No! It's Garcia!" He says.

"Ugh! It's him too. We wanna know who's cuter." She says seriously.

Hotch almost choked on his scotch and Rossi chuckles. "E-Excuse me!"

"We wanna know who's cuter. Me or Reid." She says again.

"Well I think you are both good-looking, but I don't have those feelings towards you." He says, looking at his watch. "And now if you'll excuse me, Beth and Jack want me home. Goodnight to all of you." Hotch says, practically running away.

Rossi just sits there unfazed. "Well, who do you pick?" Garcia asks.

"Reid is cute in the adorable sense, and you are more sultry." Rossi says, not batting an eyelash. "Does that satisfy you?"

"For now." She says.

Rossi leaves as well, and Garcia stares at Reid. "What?" Reid asks uncomfortably.

"Can I play with your hair?" she asks randomly.

"Uh… what?" he asks confused.

"I'm bored." She states.

"Ok I guess." He says, dubiously.

"Um… what is she doing?" Morgan asks.

"Playing with my hair." Reid says.

Garcia quickly hides the purple highlighter being her back. "Hi Morgan."

"Were you about to highlight his hair again?" Morgan asks.

"No…" She says.

"Baby girl, I love you, but I don't want Pretty Boy to have purple hair." Morgan says, play scolding her. "Now come on Reid. I'll take you home. It's late, and it'll be faster than the metro."

Reid ignored Garcia's giggle. "O-ok."

Garcia walks away, stuffing more highlighters in her bag. "Do you think someone spiked the coffee again?" Reid asks Morgan.

"Yes! I did! Mwahahahaha!" Garcia laughs as she runs down the hall.

"I guess we'll find out tomorrow, how many people got hit. If we haven't too." Morgan says, freaking out a bit.

"God I hope we didn't." Reid says worriedly.

TBC… lol. What do you guys think, will they all be spiked again? Stay tuned to find out. XD


	3. Chapter 3

**Spiked - Chapter 3**

Hotch walks in the next day, and everything in the office went to hell all over again. "Oh god! not again!"

As he walks into the Bullpen, he finds Kevin Lynch wearing a team Jacob tee shirt, with pointy ears, a tail, and fangs, and holding a stapler.

On the other side of the room, facing Kevin in a battle stance, is Anderson wearing a team Edward tee shirt, glitter all over him, honey colored contacts, and holding a pair of scissors. "Get ready to fight you dumb dog!" He shouts.

"You're on Blood sucker! Bella will be mine!" Kevin yells.

"Guys stop!" Emily steps in between them, still naked. "Guys I love you both, don't make me choose." she says.

"Sorry Bella, but I need to kill him, I can't stand the thought of you becoming one of them. Now get ready to fight blood sucker!" Kevin yells, ripping off his shirt.

"Noooo. i can't take it!" Emily yells as she runs away. Meanwhile Kevin and Anderson roll away in a big cloud of smoke.

Hotch just stands there in complete shock, until he hears "Come on guys! you all suck!" coming from the round table room. Hotch walks in hesitantly to find the table tipped on its side, JJ playing some kind of interactive dance game, and Morgan and Reid in the corner, literally fused together, with their tongues shoved down each other's throats.

Hotch is about to correct them again, when he hears Bam come from behind him. "Hey Hotch, you have to try my soufflé." Just then it collapsed. "Damnit! that's ok, I'll make you a new one, i think i still have some staples left! Bam!" Then he ran away.

Just then, Strauss walks in, acting like Madea. "Oh hell no! get up off the floor now before i shoot both of your asses off!" She shouts, pointing a water gun at them.

Morgan and Reid jump up and run out of the room, still holding hands. "Hey Strauss, think you can beat me?" JJ asks, setting up the game for another round.

"Bring it on biatch!" Strauss says, getting ready to play a round with her.

Hotch walks out of the round table room to have Emily run past him, still yelling no, and Garcia running after her to highlight her hair.

Hotch walks into his office and starts banging his head down on the desk. Just then, he hears an explosion. "What the hell happened?" Hotch yells as he runs out to the railing.

"I think I added too many staples." Rossi says, waving the smoke out of the room. When it cleared, he found that the oven exploded.

"What did you do?" Hotch asks, freaking out.

"I don't know. I was baking another soufflé, and the oven just went... BAM!" Rossi says.

Hotch hangs his head in surrender and calls maintenance. After about an hour of things exploding, Hotch was about ready to give up, when Will walked into his office. "What are you doing here?"

"I was coming to check on JJ and see if she wanted to go out for lunch, but i see that everything went to hell again. Did you know that Morgan and Reid were doing some...interesting things in the men's bathroom?" Will asked.

"I would prefer not to know anymore." Hotch says, obviously exhausted.

"I think that would probably be best." will says.

"You know, you would think they'd be wary of the coffee after it happened the first time, do you think they could have spiked something else here?" Will asks.

"I know, I'll get the lab to test everything that hasn't gotten blown up in the kitchen." Hotch says, exasperated.

"Guys! you'll never guess what happened!" Reid says, running in happily.

"No, what?" Hotch asks, not looking at Reid. He couldn't look at the young genius the same way anymore.

"Morgan and me are getting married!" Reid says, holding up his left hand, revealing one of Morgan's rings on his ring finger.

"oh geeze!" Hotch says, calling the lab before this goes far.

"I call decoration and dress committee!" Garcia says, blue streaks in her hair.

"I call cake topper!" Emily yells.

"I call baker! BAM!" Rossi yells.

"I call groom!" Morgan yells.

Everyone laughs as Garcia pulls Reid to her office to get his dress ready.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~3~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A few hours later, there was a huge cake in the middle of the bull pen, there was toilet paper streamers a crossed the ceiling and the place looked pretty nice despite the fact that it was toiletries and office supplies. To his suprise, Kevin and Anderson were even getting along. Emily dancing on top of the cake.

Then the music came from Garcia's computer, and Reid was being walked down the 'aisle' by Rossi in a dress and veil made entirely of toilet paper. He actually didn't look too bad.

Hotch was watching from the catwalk as a lab technician walked up to him. "Aaron, we have the test results."

"What did you find?" Hotch asked.

"Well we did an entire sweep of the break room. The coffee and the donuts on the counter seemed to have been the only things that were contaminated." the technician said.

"Is it the same drug that it was last time?" Hotch asks.

"I believe so sir." The technician says.

"Thank you." Hotch says. The tech nods and walks away. He was happy that it would wear off the next day, but he knew his team would have a horrible hangover the next day, so he went into his office after Morgan and Reid said their I do's and kissed, and sent each of them an email telling them they had a day off.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~3~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A couple of days later, they all came into the office again, asking what happened and how'd they all get spiked again.

"The coffee and the donuts were spiked again." Hotch says.

"What did we do this time?" Reid asks, horrified.

"Well you and Morgan got married, Kevin and Anderson thought they were Edward and Jacob from Twilight. Emily, you were Bella, and still naked. Strauss, you were Madea. Garcia, you didn't change. Rossi you didn't change either, but you did blow stuff up. And JJ you were obsessed with a dance game this time." Hotch says, smiling at the comical faces of his team mates as the looks of shock and horror varied.

"Dear God!" Emily says, covering her face in shame.

Hotch walked away, stifling laughter, but not before pulling Garcia aside. "Next time you want to pull a practical joke, leave the drugs out of it please." He says.

Garcia looked a little shocked that he figured it out, but then smiled. "Yes sir."

**End!**

**Here you go guys! it's done. I can't believe how crazy me and my cousin are. let this be a lesson when we're together, don't let us be bored together. we can come up with worse than this. XD**


End file.
